Awww! Yup, she loves you!

"My" baby suddenly passed away this past Monday night!  I was going to visit her the next morning, then my ex-bf called to give me the news....It was like 9/11---I'll always remember what I was doing, and the exact time.

She did have a heart condition and high blood pressure, but she got medication for it twice a day.  She weighed 20lbs, as the STUPID foster homes she's been in overfed her!!!  And they didn't always give her her medication!!!!  Anyway, she finally got a permanent home about 2 years ago.  I know he gave her loving care, and she even got to be friends with his other cat eventually.  Now, SHE keeps walking around and looking for her friend...

My baby!!!  She was doing so much better, more relaxed, more playful than ever sometimes.

I wish I had visited her on Monday, but it was a holiday and I was afraid the parking would be full!  Also, her actual anniversary (when he took her home 2 yrs ago) was on Valentine's Day.  But I didn't want to go that day cause of the memories of us.....

But how could I have known?

Oh my gosh, I am SO SO SO sorry! That's really really terrible:(  I've honestly gotten to a point where my animals are like my family members, and I really lose it when one of them passes.

The thing you have to understand, is that this was not your fault and you were not expected to know. I am really sorry this happened to you, but bad things do happen to good people. (and good kitties! )

Your baby is safe and she may not be with you, but trust me she really *is* with you:)

I've never really told anyone this story, but I think you will understand. And it amy make you fell better:)

My oldest cat Cosmo passed about a year ago. He was 13 years old and I really couldn't remember what my life was like before I had him. He was my buddy, he followed me around everywhere and slept with me at night. We we're SO close, and had had a special connection since the day I got him.

When he passed, it was sudden. I just felt in my heart that he was going. But I didn't want that to be the case, of course.

He looked very skinny and wasn't eating anything but the occasional bowl of kitty milk. He just wasn't the Cosmo I knew.  By this point, I knew he was going but I still hoped.

After a few days, he was barely alive and his heartbeat  had really slowed down. I wanted to put him out of his misery, and took him up to be put down since there wasn't much of a heartbeat left,anyway.

It was the hardest thing I ever had to do, because his life was in my hands. I knew  made the right choice though.

After he left, I really had missed cuddling with him on my lap and his super soft fur. When I got home from the vet, I saw a huge piece of his fur on the floor:) I still have it.

When he had been really sick I had told him ("I would give him anything, even the moon") that night, I was driving home and I noticed how bright and yellow and full the moon was. But guess what? Cosmo used to always LOVE to watch the moon.

That's how I knew he was with me, even though I didn't think so:)  

Thank you for your kind words, Aly.  You are right; she is still my baby, and she will always be my baby.  She's on another plane somewhere; I believe I'll see her again on The Other Side.   She is still in my heart.

Your story did make me feel better.  You say you knew something was wrong.  Well, the night before (when she passed), I felt "off".  He said it happened aroung 8pm, and at that time, I had just finished watching TV and just felt off.  Then, I had insomnia all night.  I was literally up all night, thinking something is wrong somewhere. 

The next morning he called as you know.  But just before that, when thinking of the kitties, I didn't feel good like I usually do, just odd.  Like ESP of some kind.

Your experience reminded me of his previous cat.  For her, I got to say goodbye.  She wasn't doing well, not eating, etc.  The vet said she had days left, but it turned out to be just HOURS.  I had come by that day to see her, knowing it might be the last time.  It was...I told her she's always going to be my baby.  She was gone just 3 hours after I got there, so it was just in time.  She was always a fragile cat, much smaller than an average adult cat. 

What you did for Cosmos was humane.  I know it was hard, but you don't want him to suffer anymore.  What you said about his fur reminds me of these shoes I have that have her scent on them.  I know I can't smell it, but it's there and I don't want to clean them, LOL.  She kept rubbing her head on those shoes for some reason.

I hope Bonnie didn't suffer much.  My consolation is that she had a good home the last 2 years of her life, and she made a kitty friend too.

Thanks to the support of some online friends like you, and one "real world" friend, I feel better.  I guess he doesn't want to talk about it, as he hasn't mentioned her at all.  I'm wondering if he'll get another cat someday, as he seemed to really like having two cats.

For some reason, this RSS feed didn't update; I just went to this discussion directly.  Another glitch...

Im glad you're feeling a bit better. Believe me, I know it's tough. To be honest, I'm still not quite over losing Cosmo, and that has been more than a year ago. I don't think I will ever get over it fully. Because animals are just so...special and vunerable you feel like they are in your hands and when something bad happens, you think it's your fault. When Cosmo started getting sicker, I immediately second guessed myself thinking 'Did I give him bad food?' 'Was his water not clean?' 'Should I have made him get more excerise/'

When of course it wasn't my fault- it was nature taking its course and it was just his time to go. Of course I didn't want to believe that, but it was true.

Again, I'm so sorry for your loss but remember that she *is* still with you, and I'm happy I could make you feel better!

I know what you mean by not quite being over something like that.  I don't think I REALLY "get over" a loss like that, human or animal!  I remember his previous cat from when we first started going out, and she died Nov 8, 2009.  I still miss her everyday.  I light a candle for her on that day every year.

I might have already said this earlier in the discussion, but she was my "meal companion."  Always interested in what I'm eating, esp. if it contained meat. She'd sniff the air, and sit right in front of me and stare at me.  If I didn't give her a little bit soon, she'd meow or swat at the air, LOL!  I have a picture of her on my nightstand.  I put pictures of Natalie and Bonnie side by side, like they were in real life.

I forgot to say before that I like that name, Cosmos.  And that I would have kept that piece of fur too.

Yeah, I can't help wondering if Bonnie could have been saved.  But she can't talk and say, "Take me to the vet please.  There's pain in my chest, and I'm so tired."  I'm thinking her weight was too much for her heart and blood pressure.  It was kind of like 9/11 when I got that news from him, in the sense that I'll always remember what I was doing, the exact day & time, and where I was.

Thanks for your responses.  I was even careful whom I told the news to, as I have gotten comments like, "She was just a cat!"

Only animal lovers, cat lovers, or current/previous pet owners would understand!  Glad I know there's a cat lover on this site too.  I thought, "Hmmmm....Aly would understand."

I never even mind if some of Natalie's hair ends up on my clothes.  I don't even try to brush it off.

She curled her tiny paw around my index finger yesterday!!  It was like she wanted to hold my hand, but her tiny paw is too big for my giant (by comparison) hand.

I'm glad that you thought of me and knew I would understand! I totally do. I hate it when people just assume that animals aren't special or when one dies say "It was just a cat! Not even a person!". You can just tell that that person has never experienced the true love that a cat can offer. And that is soooo cute that she curled her paw around your finger!

My ex-bf got a new kitty!  I met him on Thursday; he ran & hide when he saw me at first.  But later, when I was a few feet away and talking to him gently, he looked at me & closed his eyes....I hope to pet him next time!

No name yet, as he likes to see a cat's personality before deciding on a name.  He's about 2 years old, with just 3 legs as he probably got hit by a car.  The agency thinks he was a stray.  His 3 legs DO NOT slow him down at all!  He can still move fast and leap onto stuff.  Mostly white, with a brown tail and brown coloring between his ears.  When I am able, I will post a picture.

He's had this kitty about 3 weeks, but he didn't tell me cause he wanted it to be a surprise! (For me to discover him on my next visit)  I ruined my own surprise by bringing up the subject of adopting another cat.....I didn't know if I should even mention it, you know?  I asked if he had any cats in mind or has gone to see any, and he said, "Okay....you might as well know.  I have a new cat."

Natalie has hissed at him when he tried to get too close to sniff her, but they are otherwise co-existing peacefully.

In a way, it's a good thing I knew so I entered the apartment cautiously.  I didn't want to startle him too much, as I'm still a stranger.  I told kitty, "This is your home, but you're still MY baby too!"

Aw that's great that he got a new cat! :) My cousin actually has a  cat with three legs and she was hit by a car when she was a kitten. Her name is Leila and she's super sweet! The three legs don't slow her down at all either!